Geoph
Kozeny - Dead at 57
The Road
Trip Ends
by Laird
Schaub
I am
typing this on the westbound California Zephyr, rumbling across
the Great Plains in the rain and fog of mid-October. I am on my
way to the Bay Area-to see Geoph one last time.
I started
writing this piece last June, the night I learned that Geoph had
inoperable cancer. Writing as pain management. It helped me to
grieve over a keyboard, remembering and honoring a great life.
Now it's time to finish it. While trains are not good for
covering distances in a hurry, they are great for reflection.
These two days of lumbering toward Geoph are, in fact, the
perfect time to complete this tribute to my friend.
o o o
I first
met Geoph in 1985 when I was pouring a sidewalk for our
neighbors. Just as I was about to start forming up, Geoph showed
up to visit a fellow community member. It turned out he had
experience with concrete and was a whiz at laying out forms. We
had fun and it was the first of my many joint efforts with the
peripatetic communitarian.
Although
he was on the road visiting Sandhill that first occasion, it was
before he was On the Road-his two-decade journey promoting
community that continued until pancreatic cancer stopped him
this fall. His odyssey had gone full circle: it began New Year's
Day, 1988 when he drove away from Stardance (the San Francisco
community he helped found in 1978), and ended in the apartment
of his dear friend and ex-partner, Eraca Cleary and her adult
daughter Mindy (whom Geoph helped raise), just blocks away from
the address in the Haight where Stardance continues as Purple
Rose.
We were
born within two months of each other, both Midwesterners, both
diehard communitarians, and both inveterate punsters. We even
looked alike, with our shiny pates and close-cropped beards
(though in recent years I got thicker while Geoph got thinner).
Our last carefree time together was at my wedding last April,
when Geoph captured 10 hours of the festivities on video. It's a
precious memory.
o o o
It didn't
take us long to discover our mutual passion for community
networking. Back in the mid-80s I was deeply involved with the
Federation of Egalitarian Communities and I recall the Assembly
where Geoph volunteered to take minutes on his computer. Each
evening he'd produce a printout of that day's proceedings that
we could proofread on the spot. We never went back to stencils
again.
Geoph was
the one who unstoppered the electron genie at my agrarian
community. When he got his spiffy Mac Plus (one of the first
portable desktop computers) in the late 1980s he graciously
shipped his old lunker computer to Sandhill so we could test
drive the Information Age. My community was furious that I'd let
the thing be shipped without permission and refused to let me
open the box-fearing Geoph's middle name may have been Pandorra.
After much gnashing of teeth, we eventually passed it along to
another community with the packing seals unbroken. A few years
later however-after Geoph had established a personal connection
with the whole community-we welcomed his staying at Sandhill for
six months while he toiled away on the first Communities
Directory, Mac Plus and all, giving us all a less
threatening taste of the brave new future.
Geoph
eventually switched to a laptop and when he traded up for a new
one in 1995, I got the old one and Sandhill entered the computer
world through the front door. We've come a long way in 20 years
(there are four computers at Sandhill today and sometimes you
have to wait for an open machine), and it was Geoph who first
gently poked a hole in our dike against the Internet. Geoph had
an impish streak. Though never malicious, he liked to shake
things up. Our first major networking project together was the
FIC's first edition of Communities Directory, which
took us more than two years to assemble. Dan Questenberry was
the Articles Editor, Geoph was doing layout, and I was the
overall project manager. Late in the process Geoph got together
with Dan (who has impressive imp credentials of his own) and
cooked up a scheme to organize the community listings from
Z-to-A, breaking away from the tyranny of the standard
alphabetic order. While I was willing to award them full credit
for creativity, I made it clear that that particular impediment
to user-friendliness was never going to happen on my watch.
Though
thwarted there, Geoph managed to find a highly original way to
obtain his first copy of the finished Directory-this baby that
took 32 months to gestate from conception to delivery. He was,
naturally, on the road when the book came back from the printer
and Don Pitzer (head of the Center for Communal Studies at the
University of Southern Indiana, where FIC was headquartered at
the time) insisted on giving him his personal copy when he
serendipitously bumped into Geoph in a rest area men's room off
I-64. Now that was creative.
o o o
Geoph had
an enduring passion for group dynamics and did a fair amount of
facilitating. In 1995 he moderated the most powerful panel on
consensus I've ever witnessed: Caroline Estes, CT Butler, Stefan
Brown, and myself at the Community Quest conference in Winter
Park CO. While the 100+ participants had a choice of three
different options every workhop slot, almost everyone at the
event was jammed into the room for that panel.
He'd stop
at Sandhill every year between Christmas and New Year's to
celebrate his birthday and share his latest game or puzzle. He'd
invariably show up with a grocery bag full of fruits and
vegetables, and his van full of tools. He would happily take his
turn in the cooking rotation, tackle a home improvement project,
or facilitate a meeting-whatever was needed.
Terrible
at deadlines, Geoph was the eternal optimist. With him, you were
never so far down that you couldn't pull it out in the bottom of
the ninth (sorry Geoph-at my wedding he said during the
ceremony that my writing had improved since I'd given
sports metaphors an unconditional release).
Geoph
typically set up the boiler room at board meetings & FIC events,
and, if we needed any, he did the signage and flip chart
graphics (his architectural schooling manifested in
exceptionally legible marker work). He was always the last one
to bed unless you counted his naps, which were taken wherever
the mood struck him-in the middle of a workshop, under a coffee
table, or even while licking stamps for a bulk mailing! And he
didn't do mornings.
Geoph was
kind and positive to a fault. While he didn't duck hard topics,
he could be so gentle that you might miss that he was giving you
critical feedback. Kind of like getting a shot from a doctor who
is so skilled with a needle that you never feel the prick.
A music
lover, he had a fine voice and was often seen playing his
vintage Martin guitar and leading singalongs late into the
evening. One of his most requested tunes was Junk Food
Junkie, popularized by Arlo Guthrie. Geoph enjoyed
lampooning hypocrisy and the irony of celebrating habits he
didn't have (Geoph was scrupulously careful about what he ate
and drank). He was a marathon driver, once making it from
eastern Missouri to western Oregon in the same time it took
Amtrak to get there. He left one hour after I boarded the train,
and, driving alone, arrived one hour after me, even though the
train was on time. I couldn't believe it-both that Geoph was so
quick and that Amtrak was on schedule.
In the
early years of the Road Trip, Geoph took countless pictures and
gradually stitched together an incredible slide show of
contemporary communities, which he offered up for an evening's
entertainment wherever he went. While he used his slide show to
introduce thousands of people to the wonderful world of
cooperative living, by the mid-90s Geoph could see that video
was going to be a much more potent medium, and he committed
himself in 1997 to his most ambitious project: Visions of
Utopia, a television-quality documentary that offered a
balanced overview of the Intentional Communities Movement.
He
completed the first 90-minute volume in 2002, and had virtually
all of the raw footage shot for the second and final volume
before the cancer claimed him. Working from his film and notes,
I've agreed to pick up where he left off and oversee the
completion of his magnum opus. We're in the process of raising
$32,000 to accomplish this and have already gathered half the
money in checks and pledges. (If you are inspired to help us
with the other half, tax deductible donations can be made out to
"FIC" and sent to: Visions of Utopia, Rt 1, Box 156, Rutledge MO
63653.)
o o o
As near
as I know, Geoph wasted none of his precious last months in
denial. While he was hopeful of beating the long odds of a bleak
prognosis, he was nonetheless able to talk matter-of-factly
about the disposition of his modest assets, and how to carry on
his work. Part of what was special about Geoph was that there
were never any topics off-limits.
His last
100 days were amazing. While he was weak and had lost a lot of
weight, he was seldom in pain and he saw as many of his friends
and relations as he could. He was perfectly willing to have work
in the queue for how he'd spend his time; he just wasn't willing
to do much of it when there was an interesting conversation to
be had, or a card game that could bring everyone together.
His last
outing was to attend a reunion picnic for Co-op Camp Sierra-camp
being a two-week event every summer that was an anchor in his
annual peregrinations. It was dear to his heart and he'd been
one of the main organizers for as long as I'd known him.
In the
end, he grieved more for his unfinished work and the connections
he didn't yet have time to make, than for his unlived years. If
you look up "networker" in the dictionary, you'll find a picture
of Geoph.
It is
amazing to reflect on the number of connections that Geoph's
passing effected. Even as his voice grew weak and his speech
became slow and thick, his mind remained lucid and his spirit
was strong-he was drawing people into connection with one
another right up until the end.
It was an
honor to be an information conduit for news about Geoph during
his illness. As his health deteriorated over the final weeks
there was also great poignancy in helping decide who would get
into his room, knowing that the visits both sustained him and
exhausted him, as well as placing an extra burden on his heroic
caregivers (Eraca, Mindy, and Geoph's sister Penny), who had
given over their house and lives to hospice work and a steady
flow of strangers who wanted to pay homage to their friend.
Through
me, people sent poems, songs, well wishes, healing food,
alternative therapies… and love. I was blessed to witness the
breadth and strength of that outpouring, to bask in the
reflected glory of the web of Geoph's life.
For a
networker, it's all about the connections. So it made perfect
sense that celebrating and reinforcing that life work was how he
prioritized his final days. One of the most powerful things
about his ending was a connection he experienced with his
family-his mother Ginny, and sisters Penny and Kim. Drawn to his
bedside, they met many of the people Geoph had built a life with
and learned what Geoph had meant to them. As a result, Geoph
found something precious that had previously eluded
him-acceptance and appreciation from his family for his
peripatetic life, and this late reconciliation of disparate
parts gave him great peace.
I was
privileged to be one of the last to visit Geoph, seeing him for
the final time only two days before he passed away in his sleep.
When I approached his bed to say farewell, he rallied to look me
in the eye and squeeze my hand. His parting words were, " I
could see you in three months, or next week. Who knows? It's all
a mystery. Give my deep love to everyone." And now I have.
I learned
of his death the night I arrived in Austin for the fall FIC
organizational meetings. Most of his FIC family had just
gathered and we were thankful that Geoph's passing had been as
peaceful as it was, thankful that Geoph had been in all of our
lives, and thankful for the chance to circle together in our
time of grief.
Goodbye,
my friend. I'll miss you, yet won't forget how you've touched me
and countless others with the light of your dreams and the hope
in your heart.
This
Kansan rode with
The Light of Community
Into the Darkness
About
Laird Schaub: Laird has lived 34 years at Sandhill Farm,
an income-sharing rural community in Missouri which he helped
found. He is also the main administrator of the Fellowship for
Intentional Community, a network organization he helped create
in 1986, which serves as a clearinghouse of information about
North American communities of all stripes. Finally, like our
good friend Geoph Kozeny, he is an accomplished author and
public speaker about various aspects of community.
laird@ic.org
blog: <communityandconsensus.blogspot.com>
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